A Letter From Hannah: Mother’s Day Edition

I was an extremely tender child. I was soft, noncompetitive, creative, and artsy. A drifter, a dreamer, a sweet little thing who was hoping she could save the whales, or the rainforest or something in this big scary world. As I grew up, whether it was my family or teachers I was told repeatedly that being soft wouldn’t get me what I wanted in life. That the rainforest wasn’t savable, certainly not by a little thing like me, and did it really need saving anyway? Maybe I should focus on trying to make a living, focus on becoming someone strong, powerful, and fierce. So, I abandoned the sweet vulnerable artist and swapped it for a tough, serious, hardened version of myself. I started to play sports, learned how to be competitive (a little too competitive honestly), I built up walls, shut down my heart and ground away to build something of my life. And I did. With strength and determination I have built many extraordinary things that I am very proud of. But it never felt like it was all coming from a place of truth–it always felt like I was fighting against something. Then I had my son. An unplanned gift from the gods that broke me in a way that was so necessary to find my deeper, true self again. And it wasn’t until I felt the guttural depth of my femininity that I was able to see how powerful, strong and fierce vulnerability and tenderness truly are. I had it right all along. It is the sweetness that allows you to connect with others deeply, the vulnerability that lets you listen to your heart and find truth in your work, your life, and yourself. It was the physical, emotional, and spiritual opening that having a baby offered as the greatest gift; as the greatest teacher, a power beyond me.

“I had no idea being a mother would shock my system in a way that has softened me back into myself so beautifully.”

Happy Mother’s Day out there to all the fierce, unbelievably strong women in this world who ride the wave with me, my mama included. 

Xo,

H